Sad and Chara

Today, for me, is a juxtaposition of the celebration of new life and a reminder of those no longer with us...
With great joy, we celebrate the first anniversary of the birth of my son, Josiah, whose name means 'Jehova has healed.' He joins his older brothers in our crazy chaotic household, which will only be more so when starts walking, running, and being even...

Five years ago tonight, I crawled into bed next to my very pregnant wife. She was more than ready to have a baby, even if the thought of actually giving birth to a baby terrified her.
I’ve spent five years wondering what I would have done different if I had known that I would never crawl into bed next to her again. Would it change anything if I knew she would be gone in a few short hours and our daughter would be on life support systems...

This is not at all how
We thought it was supposed to be
We had so many plans for you

Dear Miranda,
Daddy still misses you, I know I always will. I was at church, watching two of your cousins get baptized this past Sunday, and the fact that you're not here with me, that I won't get to experience these little bits of life with you, hit me like a ton...