Funny And Hilarious Jokes

1. Cats do what they want, when they want.
2. They rarely listen to you.
3. They're totally unpredictable.

There were 2 whales swimming around who were very bored when they saw a fishing boat one whale says to the other, ''I've got an idea for a laugh, why don't we swim under the boat, blow water from our blowholes and capsize the boat, for a laugh''.
They proceed to do this and swim back down laughing their flippers off....

A reporter goes to the hills of West Virginia to research an article about the area. He meets an old man and asks him about memorable moments in his life.
"Well," says the old man, "one time my favorite sheep got lost. Me and my neighbors got some moonshine and went looking for it. We finally found the sheep. Then, we finished the moonshine and wound up screwing the sheep. It was a lot of fun."...

Once upon a time, there was a cat who died. When she got to heaven, God asked her how she liked being on earth. She told the Lord that it was awful -- she had to sleep in cold back alleys, where there was no food and life was hard. God told her that...